This move is tough! 😳 I had no idea that moving threw me into such a chaos state of mind, but I am quickly learning that it does. I moved so many times as a child and Hubby and I have moved more times than I care to admit. As a child we moved a lot, the longest amount of time I recall in one house is four years. I asked my mom once, “why do we move so much?”, I remember her answer was that my dad was always looking for himself. As the son of a Nazarene preacher, I know they moved a good bit too, so maybe it was in his blood. Because I married Hubby, we have stayed in one house for eight years, that was a huge feat! As I am getting older, I am content to remain. I don’t know if I was even ready to sell the last house. We purchased it to flip, so I knew we weren’t going to stay but I wasn’t sure if I was ready to let go of the lessons I got to learn there.
It’s not that I will lose the lessons, I know we will continue on our journey, but I knew what that house offered and I am not sure about this one yet. Hubby and I grew so much there, I pray that every couple who lives there will be blessed with the same growth in love for Jesus, each other, and others. I truly know that it was time to move, God really opened the door for us. Now we are in our new home and it is beautiful and a blessing and God is so good to us! Hubby hired plumbers, electricians, and sprinkler guys to get most of the things repaired and things added to make it comfortable for us. He is so on it, his mind can grasp all of the details and gets things done. I am so grateful for that man, I used to be able to do a lot more than I can today, I was really independent in fact. One of the beautiful things that came from me nearly dying eight years ago is that I am dependent, not only on Hubby but fully dependent on God.
I know that I have told you all how good Hubby is to me, well this time he has gone all out! ♥️ I have been confused and really struggled with getting routine down since we moved, one day I forgot to brush my teeth! I was horrified when I realized it! All this change really challenges parts of my brain that were damaged eight years ago. It isn’t all bad because I am burning new pathways in my brain, or training it differently. Hubby and I have learned a lot from Dr. Caroline Leaf, she’s written several best sellers that teach us about Neuroscience and how our brains can be changed, and that has helped me use the parts of my brain that were inactive. She also teaches that is only possible with God and I can personally attest to that truth. Because of my confusion and struggles, I asked Hubby if I could take time off from work, the month of June, to get my life in order and he said YES! I am so grateful right now!!
In the past, I wouldn’t ask him for a week off, much less a month and if I mentioned even a few days it could cause some riff between us. Hubby is a loving and generous man, but he struggles with some fear and me not being at work brought some of that to the surface. So I typically avoided asking and sometimes got sick because I pushed my limits. This time I asked, I hadn’t even thought about how long I just knew I needed time off. When I did need off for illness, I always felt as if I was letting him down and not fulfilling my end of the marriage agreement. It felt like he was disappointed in me and I didn’t like feeling that way. I have decided that he might be afraid, but it was the enemy that planted those thoughts in my head which caused us to fight. Hubby wants whats best for me, he always has. When I keep my eyes on the truth in experience, it makes it hard for the enemy to get his grips on me and this time, I asked, he answered, and God is good.
So, I am taking time off in the month of June. I will be at the office here and there, but no set hours. I will miss seeing many of you, but know that I love you, our patients and friends and it will be a good thing. I trust our staff to hold down the fort, they have done an excellent job during the move and I am so grateful for them! I am sure I will be writing more, you do not have to read it all. I write because I want to share that God is real, God is good, God loves us with all of His heart, and life is tough for everyone. We are all trying to get through this thing called life, one day at a time. The more we share our battles and wounds, the more we grow toward the Father. I want to magnify His name and let others know, personally, this beauty and pure love that I have found. That is why I write. Have a blessed day!
“My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.” And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.” Psalms 27:8