It Passed!!

I am so grateful for the people of Oklahoma today! I’ve shared a bit about all of the surgeries I’ve had (last count = 42) and nearly passing away several years ago, but I don’t talk a lot about the pain I endure on a daily basis. I have a history with pain pills and I have to be diligent in taking them only when I need to but pain is tough to handle and I know way too many people who suffer daily. Oklahoman’s were heard loud and clear yesterday when they passed State Question 788 with a resounding “Yes”! It wasn’t such a great night for my dad, but that is a story for another day.

I know there are a lot of opinions about 788 out there and my purpose is never to offend someone with mine, but this is my blog so if we disagree please do so with courtesy. My brother started smoking marijuana when he was in college, I don’t know if it was a gateway, but he went through some rough years figuring out life and his story. If it was a gateway, it wasn’t one that grabbed him for life, thank God. I recall trying marijuana in high school, 9th grade prom to be exact, when I discovered a lot of kids my age were using drugs. I didn’t really care for it, it made me tired and want to eat more and since weight was an issue I wasn’t adding to it. I tried it again in college and felt the same way so I stuck with alcohol, which I am going to tell you is WAY worse for my body than marijuana could ever be, but alcohol was legal and easy to get. Partying was a way of life in college, everyone in the fraternities and sororities partied. Hubby was a part of a frat and I was a part of a sorority and there were parties beginning Thursday night and continued sometimes until Sunday night. I liked to party but once our kids came it wasn’t worth it and money was always tight, Hubby was 21 and I was 23 when our oldest was born. I didn’t REALLY enjoy alcohol and I learned something about myself, I enjoyed it more once I didn’t really taste it so getting drunk happened way too often.

I have used marijuana as an older adult. With the physical struggles I have faced, including 42 surgeries and having to learn to walk again, I could be on a lot of pain medication and not many would question it. Fortunately, at the age of 48, I realize the damage getting addicted to opiates can do to a body, but worse is the damage it can do to relationships with family and friends. Though I needed and still need small amounts of pain medication, I can’t imagine what a difference it could make having the option of not taking them. Pain medications added to me nearly dying, my small bowel stopped working altogether because of scar tissue but it might have powered through had it not been for pain meds causing slow motility. They are highly addictive, I’ve read your body is addicted with the first pill, and I got addicted in 2006. Hubby didn’t even realize that I was addicted but one day I told him that I didn’t know if I would be able to get off of them. By the end of the week Hubby had a place he’d found in Florida and we were making plans for me to leave and get help. I am very grateful that, if nothing else, I got time to reconnect with God and slow down long enough to decide what was important in life. Prior to that time I was having multiple surgeries and working MANY hours a week to support us in a lifestyle that we had grown accustom but was unnecessary. I learned to get my priorities closer to a healthy place for a little bit, then my mom died and I immediately returned to pain meds to numb the pain. Four months after my mom died I was sitting in a client’s store and fell asleep because of the amount of meds I was on. The doctors would give me all kinds of things from muscle relaxers to oxycodone, the scars were real but the meds were mostly to numb severe pain on the inside and they did a good job.

I’ve been to Colorado and tried marijuana, I don’t know a lot of people who haven’t. When in Rome… Because some states have said that it is a good thing and will help sick people and those in pain, I decided to do my own research and not just listen to my upbringing. I can tell you that I do not hurt nearly as much when I have used marijuana, not only has it helped pain, but I am not as anxious from pain. Something a lot of people don’t realize is that when you hurt all day, every day, it pulls your thoughts continually. Pain causes your cortisone levels to rise and that causes more undo stress on your body which creates more anxiety. If there is a natural grown plant out there that I can have control over what’s in it and what I am getting, I am all for it! My mom did some research before she died and I believe if she were still living she would agree with me on this subject. I was raised in a high judgement home and everything was a sin including dancing, but I know that people can change and education is where it begins. I am encouraging you, do your own research. Try not to only look up things on Google that have your opinion in them. I know that smoking anything is harmful to our lungs, but with it being legal we have other options. It isn’t any more of a sin than drunkenness, as a matter of fact, alcohol and drinking are talked about in the Bible not marijuana. I look forward to hearing from anyone on this and I will listen with an open mind and heart. God bless and have an awesome weekend!